Too Much

In an effort to be an interesting person, this has led me to take on different projects; such as my belly dancing, surfing, and raising my dogs and now my chickens.

It’s true I have a lot on my plate and usually do. Why not? I don’t want to be lazy and I don’t have children to pick up from school or take to the dentist, or buy Jonas Brother’s trapper-keepers or Hanna Montana DVD’s. I do rest and watch an inordinate amount of movies. I enjoy scripted comedies instead of reality shows. I feel a duty to support my fellow writers that work hard on scripts and screenplays rather than watch d-list celebs have a group therapy session.

In an effort to not be like my mother, I have tried to listen to people rather than do all the talking or expecting to be the center of attention at all times. I have also made an effort to be supportive of the men in my life, something my mother did not do. I have also made an effort to be generous; my mother always had her hand out. I also know that we all need down time and need to be alone or with other friends and not always with me. There is also a need to tell people from time to time that you think they are fabulous, if you really feel it and I have done that.

In truth I just don’t want to be boring and when I open my mouth and have something interesting to say. I like surprising my friends by announcing I am going to get laying hens and then getting them. I want to be a doer, not a talker, like so many others.

The question that comes up is this. Is it too much and do I end up sounding like a know-it-all windbag? Is it too overwhelming for others to be around me? In my effort to not be like my mother, am I indeed turning out like her and wanting all the attention? Okay more than one question.

One thing I don’t want is for it to be a chore to be around me. I don’t want people to keep trying to find ways to shut me up. If we do this maybe she will be quiet, shut up, and settle down. Is it really that bad for me to be so passionate?

I guess it is something I need to work on. Not being over bearing and I need to dial back on telling everyone, everything that I am doing. I don’t know exactly how I am going to do that, I suppose being quite more often. Why should I come to this conclusion? I find myself by myself more and more. The ironic thing is that when I am by myself I keep busy and do interesting things so I can tell my friends later. Of course I could be just a hopeless case and it will have to be too much after all. ???