There Yet?

I try my best to keep active and take care of my dogs by walking them. In the last few weeks I have lost 5 lbs. The truth is, I need to lose like 40 more pounds to be at a good weight for myself and my health.

I am no where close to where I need to be. It can be like that in other areas in my life as well. In the last few years I have had a lot of financial set backs. I am no where near where I should be. I have been looking for jobs and have an interview next week. I don't know where I will get the energy to do the things I need to, but some how I will try to get it all done.

As far as my book goes, I am no where near to having it published and I really wanted to have that done by now and be moving on to my next project. I haven't even been working on anything new, not until I can get this 1st project off the ground.

It has not been easy getting knocked down in business dealings and it makes you feel like you are taking ten steps back. As I try to move forward with my goals there are other road blocks and they have to be dealt with. Like, how do you help your family when you don't have a job to contribute money to the bills? It makes you feel useless and as I have said before that is why its called a depression. When you feel so low, how do you find the courage to go out and promote yourself as a good employee?

For myself I have to write down my good qualities and that is hard. I am hard on myself and I think about all the things I have to do better and not about the things I do well. Still I write down, Things I like about me today. In that I can find some redeemable things that will make a good writer, employee and friend. Am I there yet? Not by a long shot. I just keep walking straight ahead.

Need to get back

The summer is coming and for tourist and beach bunnies, this is the time you think of surfing. Real surfers think of it all year long. Since I am still not that great at it, it can be a good time for me, when the surf is not that high.

The fact is that last year I had the pups to take care of and then I had to help close a shop. My garage has been such a mess I have not even been able to get my board out of the back. Now I can, so I need to get back out there.

In the mean time I have been keeping up with my walking and my belly dancing. Both help with my core, so I don't have to feel like I am balancing on my belly and have it feel like being on a bowling ball. Not fun and it doesn't make paddling out easy.

Yes its been too long and I need to get out there again. I really want to as well. All this is to keep me active and in shape as I get older. Its also a lot of fun. I have other goals I have been working on as well and it all helps out. The best is tasting the salty water in my mouth and smelling it in my hair. I can't wait.

Good tired

I have been reaching my goal of 12 miles a week with the dogs. My stamina is being built. Today I was too tired to get out. Not that I won't later. I just have other things to do.

It has been satisfying to get tired knowing I am doing something that is good for me and my dogs. When I am walking and listening to my Ipod, I feel good about myself.
The new shoes are working out great. They are so comfortable and yes my legs look better. I try not to get too caught up in the song and sing out loud, that is for home, while I watch You Tube.

It has been inspiring to see other performances and to try to improve my own. As I work towards my goals it all helps.

All this walking and my dancing makes me good and tired. I slept in today, not that I wanted to, I just couldn't get up. That the good thing about being unemployed, I don't' have to been anywhere on time. The other thing that is good is having the time to do research and find other music to use. Since the dogs are nice and tired its nice and quite when I need to work. Tired can be a good thing when you know you have worked hard to get there.

Giving things up

I love to do a good spring cleaning and purging the closets and cleaning up. I usually do a good cleaning of the house just before I do some writing project. It helps me to just concentrate on my writing knowing the house is not falling apart around me.

Other friends of mine have been giving up junk food. It seems like something small, but with all the sugar in the food it saves a lot of calories you don't need. If you do that and then go back to junk food it isn't fun. You may realise how badly it makes you feel.

There are other things we have to leave give up. Old clothes is one. On a recent trip I was able to pick up some much needed new clothes. The old ones, I can not wait to get ride of. I have been limping along with old skirts that don't fit and therefore do not flatter. I have things that look good one me right now and I haven't had that feeling in a while. I have been content with what I had and just made due. I had forgotten how nice it is to have something new and works. It may seem silly, but last year was so bad, and other than some t-shirts bought at sample sales I have not had anything new in a long time.

There are good reasons for giving things up every once in a while. We can't give everything away, but some things yes. A friend of mine gives me her surplus of cosmetics every once in a while, I usually get enough to share with even others. Waste not want not, its not just for decoration on a pillow. What things can you do without that some one else might really need?