Work

Being on my feet at work has helped me lose some of the weight I gained over the summer. It does however make my feet ache too much.

There is exercise and there is pain. I have no need for the pain. The best is dancing and working out my stress. Yesterday while I cooked I stopped every once in a while to dance to a good song on Pandora.

I found a video on Youtube of army men dancing to "Electric Avenue". It was so funny that they were keeping up their spirits up in Iraq by dancing. It was the last thing I would have thought of.

Even now as I write this my feet ache. I am so tired of that. Its like when you are tired but want to go out. I still want to dance, and my feet are so tired.

There are a lot of things I don't want to do and have to. Like working on Black Friday, which was hell. I was so tired afterwards, I was hearing things. It was no fun. Next will be the same, at least I have this weekend off. And I just might go out and dance.

Recovery

Since my surgery this last summer I have been unable to get back on my board. Its still my goal to get back out there.

Surfing has been helpful for me to calm down and deal with all that I have to do. Its my time to myself and time to recharge. Looking into the ocean and letting the water keep you up is such a fun and relaxing feeling.

I'm still land locked for now and I walk my dogs and keep busy. While I don't like my job, at least I have been off my feet and lost some of the weight I had gained while in recovery.

Last night I saw some truly inspiring performances and it makes me want to get out there and dance and perform again. I haven't been able to do my belly dancing since I have to work most Sunday nights, the time I used to perform. I will find a way to get back out there.

I do need to get back to all the things I love, the things that make me feel good about myself. If I don't I'll go crazy. The job moral is low and the work offers have not been coming in. The thought of going into the xmas season in retail is depressing. Yes, I'm grateful I have work, its just really hard on my feet.

The things that have helped is my weekly visits to get a massage and my own foot creams. If it not for the cooling peppermint creams, forget it I would be in so much pain.

Having some time alone helps as well. Since as I get older the more I find, I really don't like people. A few, but I really want to be home with my dogs and chickens and reading. The road of recovery has not been easy, but its coming to an end. Soon I will be back out on my board. :-)

Land Locked

After I have had my surgery I have not been able to go out surfing. It has been hard to be land locked for such a long time. Another reason I can't live too far inland.

In the meantime I have had to keep active by walking my dogs. They have been happy for it and when they see me put on my sneakers they start to jump up and get ready for a walk.

It helps me feel better and relive some stress. I can't really stand to look at the surf reports right, since it will make me miss it more. If I have the energy I would like to do more of my belly dancing, at least at home.

The rest of the time I am on my feet and they ache quite a bit. Another reason for me to find another job and quickly.

What can I do? Just keep up my routine and find a way to get back on my board, which always makes me feel good.

Walking

I'm still not out of the woods as far as my recovery. After talking to my Dr, I know I can't got back out surfing just yet.

In the mean time, while on dry land I keep walking my dogs as much as I can. My job also has me on my feet. It has helped me to start losing some of the weight I put on while I was resting.

I never thought I was the type to have a hard time slowing down. It really has been hard on me to relax. Now that I am back at work I feel better that I am productive. Its nice to have a paycheck again and all.

On the days I have off or on the days I still need to rest. I have to give that to myself and stop pushing myself to do more. It is easier said than done.

For now its just walking with my dogs and taking care of the chickens. :-)

Surf's Up

I won't be able to say that for a while. I had my surgery and everything went well. I am still recuperating and its not fun. Mostly finishing up years of reading and watching TV.

Not that I am only laying around. The little exercise I can do is walking. I have been walking my oldest and slowest dog Gwennie around my street. She loves it and has so much more energy when we are done. The rest of the day she is peppy. I am happy to have her as my walking buddy right now.

The rest of the summer I will be able to resume some if not all of my normal activities. Though I will get tired easily. I'm not sure going back out on my board will be a good idea, not until the fall. I don't need to be tired and out in the water just to go under. I have been getting tired walking around the OC fair and South Coast Plaza.

I did go to the beach and get in the water the day before my procedure. Which I have still not told most people what it was. There have been some wild guesses, my foot was one. Since I don't have a cast or my foot isn't bound up, then guess again. It's not that I want to be sneaky or lie about it. Its just none of any one's business. People need to learn, that No, I don't have to tell every one what's going on and No I don't want to talk about it.

As it is, things are healing well and my Dr's are happy with my progress. The summer and surf will go on without me there. That's ok, I will be out there again. When the surf is up!

Get out

At times we need to just get out there and walk the dogs, or get the board down and go to the beach.

Since it is summer people want to surf, its not the best surf here in SoCal while it is this time of year. I do want to get back out there and get my board wet, I will have to wait. I still have some medical issues I need to take care of.

In the mean time I have been walking my dogs when I can and doing my belly dancing. It helps, but its not as fun as getting in the water.

To fill the void and get out of the house I have been going to LACMA and other museums to see art and get inspired. I have felt that I end up saying the same things over and over. I try very hard not to do that.

At a recent exhibit I saw that an artist had pretty much the same style from the begging. All of their work had the same look to it. Instead of saying "All this stuff looks a like" the statement seemed to be "this artist has a clear and central theme they have stayed true to", at least that's what I got out of it. The feeling I had when I left was one of hope, that if I stick to my own vision I will be successful.

The next time I get out into the water, I will have to remind myself of that idea.

In Shape

The work that I do now is so much more demanding that before, and even after months of this, I really don't feel like I am in shape.

On my days off I have so much to do. The shopping cleaning the house, and some times walking the dogs. My oldest dog has been ill and I have had to spent time keeping her well. As a result I haven't had time to walk the others.

I have more medical things I need to take care of this year and I will. While it is for my good, its not going to be easy and it will have me on my back recuperating. In that time I will not be able to get out and walk the dogs like I want to.

It does cause me to be stressed out right now. What can I do? Eat well and keep walking. It will help me heal and the exercise will help me relieve the stress.

What do you do when you are stressed? For me its cleaning and cooking, of course my writing. The rest? For me its prayer and taking a deep breathe, I will get better and my surgery will help. Never easy to face, but necessary. It would be worse if I had not been taking care of myself before hand. I have, while not in shape, in better shape than before.

work out

This last Friday night I was performing in Long Beach for the Cario Caravan. It was the opening night, and not well attended.

In a way though it was perfect. It was my goal to perform there and not just be a spectator, and I was able to do that. The rest of the weekend was going to be full of families and my music is not for everyone. The crowd was made up of adults and it was great to perform for them.

It just so happened that I was on the main stage, the Luxor stage. That is exactly where I wanted to perform. Last year on Saturday afternoon I went up with tons of other women in a general dance and some one stepped on my foot hard with her heel and scraped up the top of my foot. She said sorry, but I still had to walk around with a bloody foot. It was not fun.

This year I had the stage to myself, just how I like it, and gave a good performance and had a good work out as well. After that we went to our favorite bar on the Queen Mary and had something to eat and drink. When I have to work and dress for them its so boring. I have to say the things they want me to. When I dance I dance because I love it and it makes me happy. After dancing I feel like myself. Even though this weekend I am sick and the rest of the weekend I am staying home and taking care of my cold, it helps me feel better.

Sure I woke up Friday morning with a cough and cold and went to the Dr, but the show must go on. My dog Gwennie got sick and she is still at the vets, and she will be fine. I was able to do my performance and go home. No one would guess all that was going on in my life, the smile that hides the truth. Not that they need to know, it was just a nice performance. As well as a good work out.

Diet

Most people think of this word as a short term eating routine that will help them lose weight. Really diet is what we eat.

Instead of thinking short term its better to think of long term. Sure we all have our favorite things to eat. Some are better than others. What will make you feel good? If you have ever stop eating fast food and then go back to it, you will find that it makes you feel bad. Then you have to stop and think, was I feeling that way the whole time and didn't notice?

Believe me packing my own lunches for work and eating and resting feels good. Its so much better than running around and chasing fast food. It also saves a lot of money. I didn't think that way when I was younger. I ate at a local place so much all the staff knew me, all of the shifts. At that time I was just so happy to have money and not have to do all the cooking. I had been the family cook for years and I needed a break.

These days I am happy to eat at home and take my left overs to work. My mother would never do this, unless I packed it for her. These are lessons I learned from my grandmother. She used to work at a company not too far from where I live now. Year in and year out she packed her lunch and went to work. At that time there wasn't a lot of places to eat at anyway. It worked for her. When I go to the lunch room I hardly see the girls I work with. All of them eat at restaurants, they would have more money for shoes if they didn't. Oh well.

The other thing is that I can control my diet. I can put in unsweetened tea and yogurt. Things that will make me feel good when I get back out on to the sales floor. Let me tell you, a good apple tastes so much better than something with MSG.

Work Out

These days with the rain and sun coming and going, I haven't been to the beach. I might tomorrow.

The other thing is that I have been working at a job that is very taxing on my body. When I was younger it was easier. Now it is so hard to get through the week. I feel I need to rest more. I am no longer used to being on my feet for 8 hours a day.

It really takes a toll on my body. Its so difficult to admit and to deal with. The way I have been dealing with it, is taking my vitamins and sticking to the diet my Dr has me on. The rest is getting enough sleep and using my cooling lotions on my legs when they are tired. I have had to use quite a bit of pain pills, I don't like to, but there is no getting around that one.

On my days off I have been taking my dogs for their walks and getting a good stretch. The rest is making sure I have proper foot wear. The younger girls were flats with no arch support or high heels. Both of those would kill me. The good thing about being on my feet, I am not gaining any weight.

I am trying to work up to 40 hrs. So far working two 8 hr days kills me and I have to lay down. Today I have a short shift and I am grateful for it. I have a lot I am grateful for, and having a job, even an exhausting one, is one of them. It can be a bit of a work out on the job, at least I'm not wasting away on the sofa getting fatter.

Move

In my belly dance class I am still learning new moves and using my muscles in new ways. The dancing helps so much in keeping me moving and wanting to do more.

Others I know run, and I mean marathons. Sure it is a commitment and I never sign up for that, dancing and surfing are their own commitment. When I really practice other dancers can see my progress. The best is getting pats on the back from your fellow dancers.

I have been looking up music for my next dance, and it is so enjoyable. Not only listening to great music but thinking of how to dance to it. What moves will I use, can I incorporate new moves and improve on the old ones.

I think of this, as I walk the dogs or do my dishes,but I never move funny or spin out on the street as film makers would have you believe dancers behave. Instead I dance in my living room and put the dog outside for a bit so I don't run into her. She is old and sleeps a lot.

There is no date for my next dance, so I have time to work something up. Since I have been deep into my 80s music it will no doubt be used to help me figure out a new routine. In the mean time I will dance and move around the living room. Why not?

Keep Walking

In the last few year I have really been working on keeping up my exercise routine. I can not say that I do that all the time.

Last year when I was depressed I hardly walked my dogs or went for a walk. It can be really hard to find the motivation. For myself, it is not to get huge. I am not the size I want to be, but I don't want to get any bigger.

As it is I have lost weight and will continue to do so, especially now that I have some clear goals. These are, to cut down on my carbs and I have stopped drinking soda all together. While doing my recycling earlier this week,I realized I had been drinking way too much soda and had tons of plastic bottles to get rid of.

The next came from my DR, who wants me to spend one hour walking every day rather than two hours every few days. My dogs have not been happy with the shorter walk time. They do know the hour we will walk and they line up at the back porch around 4pm waiting for me. I love it, their interest helps so much.

This week I was in Down Town LA and had a chance to walk around. I have not walked there in years. I hiked up to MOCA, up Grand Ave, not and easy task. Yes, I was sweaty by the time I reached the top but it was good for me. Later I swam in the pool all before diner. My reward, some cute things at the gift store. All of this reward, and I still need to keep walking.

Winter LA Style

Yes, once again I am happy I live here. There are reports of heavy snow all over the country and we have sunshine and warm weather.

What do we do with it? In the last two weeks I have been walking my dogs one hour everyday. We have the spa running again and used it twice over the weekend. This last Sunday and Monday we went to Huntington and walked along the beach at sunset.

One of those evenings we took our dogs to the dog beach and had a great time. We stopped and had a picnic in the truck went it got too cold. The dogs had a great time and like little kids, were jumping around on the way there, and slept on the way home.

Last night I was in down town LA and there was a bit of chill in the air. I still took some time to swim in the pool. I made sure to make the most of my time and did laps and exercised in the water. It made it better since we had a big meal following that. The hotel is geared for the business man and there is a gym,but why stay indoors when it is 70 outside?

In the past few weeks I have really been focused on my health and my diet. I have lost a few pounds, but mostly added more veggies to my routine. That has been a big help in feeling better. The rest of the country may be knee deep in snow, and good for them. We have a chance to walk and exercise in the warm air. I wouldn't have it any other way.